That was a sudden trip to Port Renfrew. I was complaining to O. that for 2.5 years on the island I haven’t seen handsome guys. At all! On dating apps they are mostly with a beard and fish.

I was complaining the whole way that in this moment of my life, right now, I just need a beautiful guy with a perfect body, better exactly my age, not boring, with an absolutely intriguing life and absolutely unusual personality, someone to deeply fall in love and be deeply loved in return.

O. said something like: not everything we want we can get. I said: all or nothing. She looked at me and added: I know you well – keep dreaming. Sometimes people just need to dream about something.

And then we stopped by the Fairy lake to take a picture of a “bonsai tree”. I’ve seen it before and was just waiting for O. while she was a bit shocked that we travelled that far to see such a small attraction.

Suddenly the sun came out and two beautiful dragonflies landed on my arm. That was so unexpected and magical. I held my breath and was just watching them flying around each other, playing in the air and probably making love right on my arm without any embarrassment.

I thought: oh god, or the universe or however you wanna be called, why do you let others be so restless and happy in their love and joy? Why do you let others? Just let – me! I got 3 degrees, I’ve successfully completed a cool research that I obtained a grant for, I even made a whole website dedicated to how to engage tourists in ocean cleanups. I was an invited guest speaker at the university. God, looks like I am really cool.

I always knew what I didn’t want, but today I finally know what I DO want. And it is such a basic human desire. Well, not really basic, still need some nuances. Anyway, come on, god, let me be like these two dragonflies, living their best life through the rays of late October sun, solemnly and selflessly making love without any embarrassment.

O. captured this moment.

And at the end of October I found my very special dragonfly: beautiful, with a perfect body, exactly my age, absolutely not boring, with an intriguing life and unusual personality, the dragonfly to fall in love with – deeply, and be deeply loved in return.

Sometimes it doesn’t matter, what happened next. But being able to have the most beautiful moments that two people can ever have – isn’t it precious – just by its very nature.